What Animal Am I?

Yesterday was spent in line. Financial Aid, Registrar, Financial Aid again, Business Office, Campus Police, Testing Admin, Help Desk... ahh to be in college again!

One of the highlights of my day, aside from dropping $200 on three (used!) books was visiting Ye Olde Bookstore. You see, inside the store one might find paperclips and vine charcoal, book bags and rosaries (ahem... Catholic college) and, I was pleased to discover, even a hot cup of coffee. But keep your eyes open and if you're (un)lucky enough you just might catch a glimpse of the Hardcover Hag.

She has green, slimy teeth and brilliant orange eyes that glow in dark corners. Her long snarls of mouse-poop riddled hair tend to fall out in clumps, leaving a clear trail leading back to whatever nasty nest she last inhabited. Hardcover Hag hails from the steamy swamps of Kentucky, and it is her bitterness at becoming an employee of a Texan institute of higher learning that has led her to survive on a diet of confused freshmen rather than her previous menu of snake entrails.

Wicked, huh?

(I think I'm just mad at her for being bitchy to a student employee right in front of me, ordering him to do her bidding instead of helping me find a book. He apologized to me under his breath, so I will spare him the title of Hardcover Hag Underling)

OK, so that sounded a little bitter. Actually, I found it quite funny. Funny because, under the advice of former Lake Bookstore employee and good friend "the middle part of: Bressicamy," I had refrained from applying for a job at said bookstore. I didn't really believe Bressicamy when she said to stay away because the manager is a little nuts-o...who could really be that bad? I'll tell you who;

The Hardcover Hag.



Back to the title of this post. The esteemed Our Lady of the Lake University is the first college I have attended that has an official mascot. Mat-Su College doesn't even bother to spell out it's entire name, much less devote the time and energy necessary to create a buzz around an animal that represents its ideals and spirit. The College of Visual Arts has recently adopted the mighty squirrel as its representative, but that came after my time.

The Lake boasts a very prestigious, indigenous animal to carry the responsibility of instilling school pride and excitement at games or events...I'll give you three guesses what it is.

Falcon?
no.
Rattlesnake?
nope.
White Tailed Deer?
way off.

Our symbol of school pride is the impenetrable...ARMADILLO. Yeah, you heard me. And you know what they call orientation for the year's freshmen?

Get ready for this.

Camp Dillo.

Now, some might scoff and say that the armadillo is useless. That it does not do anything practical for us, like pack supplies up rocky mountain trails or allow the blind to lead more fufilling and independant lives. But I ask you this, what would an armadillo race really be...without the armadillo?



All right, this post is growing a little too long. I don't want you to get bored. So me and my new Armadillo t-shirt are off to study for the GRE and learn a little bit about kiddos. Until next time...

DILLOS RULE!!
(stop snickering. I clearly said 'dillos'.)