No, I'm not a superhero. Yes, you might want to believe I am a superhero. I have been known to leap small puddles in a single bound. Surprising as it may sound, the name has nothing to do with me and everything to do with my romantic entanglement with Boy Ferret. It's true. I am married to a fuzzy mammal who purrs when I tug his ears.
You say you want to hear the story? All right, snuggle into bed. Have someone "fluff" your covers and get ready...
Once upon a time, in a pre-Kirsten era, just after the massive marketing success of the Budweiser Toads, Boy Ferret worked. And worked. And worked and worked. After one especially heinous triple shift, he mumble/muttered something to a co-worker. "What?!" The comrade, just as sleepy as our hero, could not understand him. Boy Ferret repeated himself, but to no avail. The weary colleague proclaimed, "Man, you sound like the damn Budweiser Ferret!"
It stuck.
J was henceforth known as Ferret. On occasion, The Ferret. That was all. Until that fateful day when he found me.
Enter: Internet Girl
We met, fell in love, and before long I was dubbed "Girl Ferret" by default. "The" Ferret became "Boy" Ferret. Together we are The Ferrets. Or Damn Ferrets. Or Frikkin Ferrets, when Neutron Cow catches us in a particularly cute pose. We live in a republic: the Republic of Ferretakistan. And, after more than four years as ferrets without ferrets, we adopted Skwentna and Maui.
So my story begins. After reading this far you might be intrigued. You might be bored. You might wonder, "This is a rather mundane bit of a story, but still I am interested. What is this phenomenon I am experiencing, and who is responsible??" The answers are, in the following order: Voyeurism and Hanni.
What's more fun than peeking into open windows while driving down a residential street? There is a certain satisfaction we get in finding out something private, especially if it is not something that would otherwise be discovered. So, while many of you already know the origin of "The Ferrets", I promise you that in future ramblings you will venture further into the happenings of Female Mustela Putoris Furo.
As for the "who", my girl from Alaska, fellow lover of those who smash pumpkins, the one who wasn't afraid to headbang with me while everyone else did the electric slide, everybody give it up for HANNI!!! And check out her blog, Hanni Haus. She's a writer, I'm an artist...I'm going to give this a go because her blog entertains me and I'd like to try to return the favor-- and when she comes to visit I'll throw a paintbrush at her and see what happens...
For now, Neutron Cow has just handed me a beer and cooked up a pizza...I'm off to pretend to understand football as a form of thanks.
Until next time, my ferret followers...
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